


Manadh

by trappednightingale



Series: Fate [1]
Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-19
Updated: 2012-12-30
Packaged: 2017-11-21 13:41:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 8,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/598386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trappednightingale/pseuds/trappednightingale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fill for the following prompt on the kink meme:</p><p>"Elrond and Faramir aren't the only ones with the gift of prophecy. Kili has it, too. And he knows that door through his dreams..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There’s something exciting about going on a quest, about leaving behind the daily grind in favor of an adventure that promises new sights, companionship, and events that have the potential to change a person forever. Perhaps this is why Kili brightened when Fili told him they were answering Thorin’s call. The journey to their meeting-place went quickly with talk of what awaited them, and when they finally saw the faint glow of the mark on the door in the distance, it was thoughts such as these that filled their heads. Until they neared the door itself, and Kili instantly wished they’d stayed behind for this quest. For there before his eyes was the Door; a door he’d seen many times in his dreams. 

The first time Kili dreamt of the Door, he was a young child, still young enough to sit on his mother’s lap while she sang lullabies. He told his mother about the dream, and about the feeling in his stomach like dancing moths. Kili remembered very clearly the look on her face as he spoke; a look of fear that quickly turned to something softer, something that spoke of nothing but love for her child.

“You have a gift, my love.” She’d said. “No matter what comes to pass, remember that it is a gift. The door in your dream is very important. If fate is kind to you, that door will lead you to someone very important; someone you will love, and who will remain by your side until the end of your days.”

“It is a gift.” Kili muttered to himself as they knocked on the door. Fili shot him an amused look, then shifted his attention to the hobbit standing in front of them, causing Kili to do the same. He remained solemn, eyes taking in as much of the hobbit as he could, already feeling a sense of…rightness that he hadn’t felt in years. 

He and his brother introduced themselves, giving a slight bow. By the time he rose from the bow, Kili was grinning impishly, already back to his old self and ready for whatever fate had in store for him.


	2. Chapter 2

“You must be Mister Baggins.” Kili was beaming as he spoke, sharp eyes taking in every detail of the hobbit before him. 

“Nope, you can’t come in, you came to the wrong house.” He moved to close the door, but Kili immediately stepped forward and prevented it from closing completely, hand brushing over the hobbit’s as he did. 

“What? Has it been cancelled?” For a brief, heart-stopping moment thoughts crossed his mind of /How will I ever meet my fate now?/.

“No one told us.” Fili added, shooting his brother a reassuring look. 

“No, nothing’s been cancelled.” Baggins looked perplexed, but Kili ignored the look and practically beamed at him. 

“Well that’s a relief.” He pushed past Baggins, giving the place a quick once-over while his brother handed over their weapons.

“It’s nice, this place.” Kili finally offered, genuinely impressed with the home. “Did you do it yourself?” Seeing a raised…fixture of some kind, he proceeded to wipe his boots off on it. After all, the hobbit seemed uppity, and would probably protest if he tracked mud into his home.

“No, it’s been in the family for years—that’s my mother’s glory box, can you please not do that?” 

Kili winced slightly at the tone of his voice. It seemed as though he had still managed to aggravate his…intended? What word should he even use for the creature whom fate had decided was to be his? For it was more than obvious that Baggins was the sole inhabitant of the home and therefore he must have been the one his dreams had been leading him to.

“Fili, Kili, come on, give us a hand.” Dwalin interrupted Kili’s thoughts as he clapped a hand on his shoulder and led him to the next room. 

Everything after that was a blur, but a happy one, full of laughter and food and song like Kili hadn’t had in years. Despite it all, he was still painfully aware of Bilbo’s discomfort at their party. He wondered if the hobbit had been having the same dreams he had, if he had any idea what fate had in store for them. Kili only had the vaguest understanding of what was to come, and he must have had a concerned look on his face because Fili pulled him out of his seat and nudged him towards the door. 

“Don’t fret. Mother said you can’t rush these things, can’t control them. You must allow things to happen as they will.” He clasped a hand on Kili’s shoulder, then moved to position himself in the sort-of assembly line they’d created in the kitchen so they could clean up the mess they’d made. Kili could hear Bilbo’s protests as they began tossing the dishes and clanging the forks and knives together in a rhythmic manner. 

“Can you not do that? You’ll blunt them!” Bilbo flew past Kili into the dining room to scold the dwarves handling his silverware. 

“Oh? Did you hear that, lads? He says we’ll blunt the knives!” Bofur grinned, and the other dwarves laughed in response. Finally getting a feel for the rhythm of their movements and clanging, Kili chose that moment to start singing.

“Blunt the knives, bend the forks—” he began and Fili immediately joined in. 

“Smash the bottles and burn the corks!”

“Chip the glasses and crack the plates…That’s what Bilbo Baggins hates!” the rest of the dwarves were singing along, and even Gandalf seemed to be entertained by their antics. Of course, Master Baggins himself seemed less than amused by the whole thing, but by the time the song was over, Bilbo was left staring in shock at a pile of perfectly cleaned and organized dishes. He met Kili’s eyes across the room, and he immediately gave the hobbit a broad grin, laughing as he clutched his pipe in hand. Kili could have sworn he saw a slight smile tugging at Bilbo’s lips as their gazes locked, but the moment was ruined the second the knock came at the door. 

XXX

They spoke of the quest, of dragons, of the dangers that they were sure to face. The entire time, Bilbo’s face just seemed to get paler and paler, even in the dim lighting of the candles. Kili wanted to say something to reassure him, but Fili, always a step ahead of him, beat him to the punch. 

“We may be few in number, but we are fighters, all of us. To the last dwarf!”

“And you forget, we have a wizard in our company. Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons in his time!” he added, confident that Bilbo would be reassured with the knowledge that at least one of their company was experienced in quests such as these. The slight relief on Bilbo’s face vanished with the ensuing argument and chaos, and Kili immediately regretted bringing Gandalf into it. His spirits were lifted with Thorin’s speech, but he could tell that Bilbo was still not convinced, especially once he was handed the contract for their journey. When the hobbit hit the ground, unconscious, Kili was on his feet in an instant, making his way through the crowded room to crouch at Bilbo’s side. 

“Now you’ve done it.” He shot Bofur and irritated look, and the other dwarf held his hands up defensively.

“I was only trying to help! He seemed confused about the concept of incineration!”

Kili sighed and hoisted the hobbit up, wrapping a limp arm around his shoulders and holding him up by the waist as he helped him to a chair in the other room. Seeing that he was beginning to come to, Kili moved to stand next to Fili in the living room. He tried to concentrate on his pipe, on the conversation Fili was having with Ori, but he was completely focused on the conversation Bilbo and Gandalf were having in the other room. 

“Sorry, Gandalf. I can’t sign this. You’ve got the wrong hobbit.”

Kili tried to tell himself that the feeling in his stomach was relief, because the hobbit really would have been a burden to the rest of them, and most likely would have gotten himself killed.

But Kili never was good at lying to himself.

XXX

They set off early the next morning, leaving their burglar to slumber on in peace as they left the little green door behind. They had barely gotten past the gate of Bilbo’s garden when Kili was hit with a wave of sadness.

He would actually miss Bilbo on this adventure, even though they’d been acquainted scarcely over a few hours, and even though they’d barely even exchanged words. Already the hobbit had become important to him, and were it not for his knowledge of fate working in mysterious ways, it would worry him. But as it was, he knew that fate had led Gandalf to that door, and fate had brought Kili and Bilbo together for a reason. 

“He’ll change his mind, won’t he?” Kili asked Fili, trying to mask the concern that he knew was written all over his face. 

“I bet he’ll be along within the hour.” Fili smiled reassuringly.

“And what, pray tell, are we placing bets on?” Gandalf inquired, causing the other dwarves to immediately jump into the conversation, voicing their opinions on whether or not Bilbo would be joining their company. Kili’s hopes fell drastically once he saw that only a few of them were betting on Bilbo’s change of heart, but he refused to lose hope completely. 

When he heard a familiar voice crying out for them to wait, he uttered a silent prayer of thanks for the overwhelming optimism he’d undoubtedly inherited from his mother. He exchanged a brief nod of acknowledgement with the hobbit, and his delight only heightened when, minutes later, the bet was explained and Bilbo shot him a pleased smile when a bag of silver was tossed his way.


	3. Chapter 3

Fili and Kili were reminiscing about the days of their youth and the pranks they’d pulled on their kin when Thorin’s voice cut their conversation short. “We camp here for tonight. Fili, Kili, look after the ponies.”

The brothers nodded, dismounting so they could lead the ponies to a more protected area of their chosen campsite. The other dwarves followed suit and Kili found himself watching Bilbo intently, but made no move towards the hobbit.

“It’s been a few days… You should say something to him.” Fili remarked quietly. 

“I am at a loss for words when I am around him.” Kili replied, heaving a deep sigh. “Also, I believe he is still cross because I teased him about the orcs a few nights ago, even though I meant nothing ill by it.”

“Our dear hobbit does not have the same sense of humor as you and I, brother. You should keep that in mind in your dealings with him.” They paused in their conversation to listen to Gandalf and Thorin debate their choice of campsite, exchanging wary glances when Gandalf suggested taking sanctuary with the elves. After the wizard stormed off, Fili and Kili began taking the ponies from the other dwarves so they could begin to set up camp, and only resumed their conversation once they were further away, in an area where the ponies could graze while still remaining in their sights.

“What about your earlier words? About allowing things to happen as they will?”

“In order for anything to happen, you have to at least speak with him. Fate has laid a path, but you have the freedom to choose whether or not to follow it. You still have to take the first step, in either direction.”

Kili fell silent, contemplating his words. 

“Besides, we’re on a dangerous quest. There’s no way of knowing which breath will be our last. We ought to make the most of every moment and chance we have.”

“You know, then, of my growing unease. Of what lies ahead.” Kili tried to keep the accusation from his voice, but his eyes had grown dark. 

“I only know of what you’ve told me. That the door signifies the beginning of your end…Of our end.” He amended. 

“Then you know why I do not wish to prove these dreams true.” Kili lifted his eyes from the horses, watching the sun as it began to set. “Perhaps Gandalf was right to encourage us to camp elsewhere… That house,” he nodded towards the burnt-out home. “It is familiar to me.”

“You believe something bad will happen tonight?” 

Kili refused to answer, trying to shake off the feeling of unease that was threatening to overwhelm him. 

“Perhaps you could start a conversation with Bilbo by telling him of our home, what it used to be.” Fili suggested suddenly, returning them to their earlier topic of conversation.

“He does seem to enjoy a good story, although he seems much more fascinated when members of our company speak of our travels and quests. He has a hunger for adventure, you can see it in his eyes sometimes. He simply needs to abandon this fear he has of experiencing his own.”

Fili was smiling now, having seemingly forgotten the grim tone their conversation had adopted just moments prior.

"What?" Kili asked.

"Your face... I've never seen you make that expression. It is... not affectionate, something more than that. Fondness is a good look for you, brother."

Kili opened his mouth to protest, but he immediately shut it, eyes darting around the field warily. "How many ponies did we have?"


	4. Chapter 4

Kili heard the slightest of footsteps on the forest floor behind them, and he didn’t have to turn his head to know that Bilbo had joined them. His first thought was that it was really nice of him to bring them dinner, but he couldn’t be bothered to comment on it because his mind was spinning with thoughts of “Thorin is going to kill us” and of “is there any way this won’t end badly?”.

They explained the situation to Bilbo, who seemed less than thrilled at the prospect of hunting down whatever had taken their ponies. But then, of course, Bilbo had to take them completely by surprise by actually going along with his and Fili’s goading and attempting to stealthily free the horses. They remained in the shadows, watching Bilbo’s movements, and Kili found himself growing more impressed with the hobbit than he cared to admit. The second the trolls noticed him, Kili instantly took a step forward, but Fili held him back. 

“Wait for the opportune moment, or we’ll all be killed.” His brother hissed, and Kili reluctantly nodded in agreement. But then one of the trolls had Bilbo by the legs and another was telling him to hold the hobbit over the fire and damn the opportune moment, he wasn’t going to let them hurt his hobbit.

Kili rushed into the clearing, sword swinging wildly as he felled the first troll. “Drop him!” he roared, eyes fixated on Bilbo, trying to see if he’d been hurt or injured in any way. With the exception of the troll slime covering his body, he seemed unharmed, so Kili shifted his attention back to the creature holding him.

“What?” One of the remaining trolls asked, looking incredibly confused. 

“I said,” Kili replied, shooting Bilbo a cocky grin as he spun his sword. “Drop him.”

A slight change in the troll’s facial expression was the only warning he got before Bilbo was tossed at him. His sword flew out of his hands as he found himself with an armful of hobbit. They fell to the ground, and for a fleeting second he worried that he wouldn’t be able to protect either of them, but then Thorin was charging into the clearing, the rest of their company shortly behind him. 

“Thank…Thank you.” Bilbo smiled at him gratefully as Kili slowly stood and offered a hand.

“Anytime.” Kili’s grin broadened as the hobbit clasped his hand. He had to remind himself that there was a battle going on, and he hastily tugged Bilbo to his feet. “Try to get the horses out. We can take care of the trolls.” 

Bilbo looked like he wanted to say something else, but Kili gave him a gentle shove and turned into the fray.

He’d forgotten how much he loved the thrill of battle, of fighting alongside people he trusted. He tried to keep an eye on Bilbo, but it didn’t take long for him to get caught up in the fight. So when Thorin, who was fighting alongside him, stilled suddenly, he whirled in confusion. It took him a second to register that the troll had picked up Bilbo again, and he leaped forward as soon as it hit him.

“Bilbo!” Kili shouted, almost getting the breath knocked out of him when Thorin’s arm shot out to hold him back. He gave him a look of disbelief. They should be charging the troll for the unforgiveable crime of taking their burglar. Did Bilbo really mean so little to Thorin as a member of their company? 

“Lay down your arms.” The despicable creature spoke. “…or we’ll rip his off!”

There was a pause, and Kili could see the look on Bilbo’s face, could see that he truly thought that they would allow him to die. Kili glanced over at Thorin, trying to get a read on what their leader would do. When Thorin finally stuck his sword in the ground, Kili had to bite back a protest. They could have easily charged the trolls and taken back what was theirs. However, even in his state of heightened emotions, he could see that there was no guarantee they could fell the trolls before they ripped the limbs off of Bilbo, and that was hardly a risk he was willing to take. With a huff, Kili tossed down his own sword and offered up a silent prayer to whatever gods were listening that they would survive that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I know this chapter was super short, but I promise to write more over the next few days. The next update probably won't be until Saturday since I have to work the night shift at my job, but I promise to try to update again as soon as I possibly can.  
> Congrats on surviving the "apocalypse"!  
> Oh, and if you have a particular scene you'd like to see, or just anything you want to see in general, feel free to go to my inbox on Tumblr :) I love prompts, and I'd love to be able to talk to you guys~
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to the lovely echelonlove, who runs the arrowsandjam blog on Tumblr! If Kilbo is your cup of tea, check it out!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to "ilovealistair", who requested the scene in which Kili gets offended because Bilbo declares that he and the company have worms.

The worst thing about being captured by trolls, Kili decided, was not the fact that death would come in the form of being eaten alive, nor was it the stench of the foul creatures, or even the regret that overcame him at the thought that the quest would never be finished, and his fate would never be realized. No, it was certainly the feeling of helplessness as he watched his friends being roasted over an open fire, knowing he could do nothing to save them. Kili glanced over to where Bilbo was nestled next to Balin and tried to give him a reassuring smile, although it came out as more of an apologetic grimace. The hobbit seemed…thoughtful, somehow, even as their captors argued over how to cook them.

“Wait!” Bilbo shouted suddenly. “You are making a terrible mistake.” One of their companions who was roasting on the spit, Kili couldn’t quite make out which one, replied “You can’t reason with em, they’re half-wits!”

 

 

“Half-wits? Then what does that make us?” Another asked.

 

 

“I meant with the—with the seasoning!” Bilbo continued, ignoring their protests.

 

“What about the seasoning?” One of the trolls asked.

 

“Well, have you smelt them?” Kili shot Bilbo an incredulous look as his conversation with the trolls continued, crying out in outrage when Bilbo suggested skinning them first. These dwarves had risked their lives for him, and he repaid them by telling the trolls to eat them in a far more painful way? As if that weren’t bad enough, Bombur had landed on Kili after a troll had tossed him aside due to Bilbo’s declaration of “He’s infected! He’s got…worms in his…tubes!” and then proceeded to declare that they all had parasites. Truly, fate had been harsh in her decision to pair him with such a rude creature.

 

“Did he really—We do not have parasites!” Kili protested angrily. “ _You’ve_ got parasites you—” He was cut off when Thorin kneed him in the back, and he shot the older dwarf a questioning look. Someone next to him voiced their agreement with Bilbo’s statement of parasites, and realization hit Kili almost immediately. Bless his brilliant hobbit and his quick thinking—stalling for time was quite possibly the only thing that could save them.

 

“I’ve got the biggest parasites, huge parasites—” Kili began to shout, ranting on and on about these fictitious creatures supposedly devouring their insides. Bilbo looked over at him with a—dare he even say?—somewhat affectionate yet certainly exasperated smile, then returned his attention to the trolls. One of the creatures seemed to grow increasingly suspicious, and after a moment called their bluff.

 

“What would you have us do, then? Let em all go? You think I don’t know what you’re up to? This little ferret is taking us for fools!”

 

“Ferret?” Bilbo asked in disbelief.

 

And just when Kili thought the situation was hopeless, and that there was no way to escape their predicament, a booming voice came from behind the trolls.

 

“The dawn will take you all!” Kili heard a loud crack, and suddenly the clearing was full of light, their captors slowly turning to stone in the daylight.

 

Once they were certain that the trolls were no longer a threat, Gandalf helped a few of them get free, and the dwarves slowly began to right themselves, getting back into their clothes and armor and taking stock of what supplies they had left.

 

“Here, let me.” Bilbo offered, kneeling by Kili’s side so he could un-do the knots that kept him confined in the sack. Once he was free, Kili clasped a hand on Bilbo’s shoulder.

 

“Thank you. Were it not for your quick thinking back there, we’d be goners.”

 

“You all risked your lives for me, laid down your arms when you could have kept fighting and escaped with your lives. I couldn’t let you all be eaten by trolls. Besides, I don’t believe ‘ingestion’ was one of the deaths covered in our contract.” Bilbo’s smile was light, teasing almost, and Kili couldn’t help but grin in response.

 

“Exactly! Besides, I knew fate couldn’t be so cruel as to have us all perish at the hands and teeth of trolls.” Bilbo had a strange look on his face at that, but before Kili could question him, Thorin and Gandalf were moving away from the clearing, and their company was following. Kili gave Bilbo’s shoulder a brief squeeze, then rose to his feet.

 

“Never a dull moment with our company, that’s for sure.”

 

“No, definitely not.” Bilbo agreed absent-mindedly, still looking somewhat troubled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning roughly five more chapters, and also an epilogue. So in the meantime, if you have a scene you'd like to see done, let me know, either in a review or in my Tumblr askbox :)
> 
> Also, feel free to leave constructive criticism; this is my first time filling a prompt for the kink meme so it would really help me if you tell me what you do or don't like about my fic/writing, etc.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kind of had a miniature meltdown when I realized that "Kili" was actually spelt "Kíli".  
> So yeah. That'll be fixed in all future chapters, and I'll probably go back and edit the previous chapters to reflect the change after I'm done writing it.  
> Sorry it took me so long to update! I promise I'll do better :) Thanks for all your encouragement and kind words~ This chapter would definitely have not happened without it!

Kíli would sooner die than admit it, but Rivendell was a welcome relief after surviving the trolls, and the orc attack so shortly after. He understood the dissent between the dwarves and the elves, after all, their quarrel ran deep in the blood of every dwarf and elf in Middle Earth. Rivendell was much different from any of the towns and cities he and Fíli had lived in, so naturally, his curiosity got the better of him, and he found himself exploring the elvish outpost. 

He could still hear the distant clamor of the company even as he wandered away from where they’d set up camp. The dwarves had decided on sleeping outside in one of the courtyards so they could still enjoy a fire as well as each other’s company. Not to mention Thorin’s adamancy that they accept as little aid from the Elves as possible. Kíli had only been wandering for a short time when he noticed a figure sitting underneath a tree. As he got closer, he recognized the wavy hair and decided to join him.

“Thought you’d still be in the council with Thorin and Balin.” Kíli said, plopping down next to the hobbit. He leaned back against the tree, pressing their shoulders together. 

“No, that ended awhile ago. Balin wanted to speak with Thorin privately, and…Lord Elrond and I spoke for a short time.” Bilbo seemed troubled, so Kíli nudged him lightly.

“Oh come now. The old elf couldn’t have been so bad.”

“No, not at all!” Bilbo quickly replied, shaking his head. “He was perfectly fine. We just discussed some things that I am still mulling over. Did you know he has a gift of…prophecy? Or foresight would be a better word for it, I suppose. 

Kíli stilled at that. “No, I was unaware of this… How does he deal with such a burden?”

Bilbo gave him an odd look. “That’s a strange question… Why would you think it would be a burden? To see things before they happen…it would give you an advantage in life, wouldn’t it?”

“Yes, but what if you see something…horrible? Or sad? To live your entire life knowing such a thing could happen… To me, that is a burden.”

“Hm…I hadn’t thought of that.” Bilbo’s eyes moved over his face, and Kíli’s breath caught in his throat at the intensity in the gaze. “I suppose that would be difficult.”

Kíli had to look away, so he focused his attention on the ground and absently picked at the grass near his leg. “So, what did he have to say that has you so solemn this evening?”

“He taught me a word in one of the languages the elves use—I believe he said it was called ‘Sindarin’?—but… he said it has a complex meaning. It can mean doom, but it can also mean destiny…or fate. He said it was the only word he could properly use for…for what he’d seen for me.”

Kíli’s stomach did a flip at that, but he was instantly curious. “Oh? What was the word?”

“Manadh. It sounds so…so simple for such a heavy word.” Bilbo’s face had once again become contemplative, his brow furrowed as he spoke. “I don’t like to think that…this adventure is fated, that I was meant to go on it, and yet it will also be my demise.”

“Fíli…Fíli and I both knew it would be like that.” He said quietly. “I think we all did. That’s why it’s so important to treasure the quiet moments, the times we almost die but don’t, the time we get to spend together.”

Kíli blinked as he felt a hand cover his own, and he looked over at Bilbo in surprise.

“This all must be very important to you, to all of you. To risk your lives for a city that fell ages ago.” The hobbit murmured.

“It is. But with Fíli and I… it’s deeper than just dwarvish pride. Thorin is our uncle, so we are his sister-sons. If he calls, we answer. We would die for each other without a second thought, but that’s what kinship is. The important thing isn’t that we’re reclaiming our city. It’s our loyalty, our bond. Besides…” he flashed Bilbo a grin. “I never was able to resist an adventure. The second I saw your door, I knew we were in for the time of our lives.”

“What does my door have to do with anything?” Bilbo asked, but Kili was rising to his feet, pulling the hobbit with him. 

“C’mon, then! You’ve spent more than enough time out here on your own. We should explore the city. After all, you never know when you’ll get another chance to see an Elvish settlement. I certainly hope to never seen one ever again.”

Bilbo rolled his eyes and let out a slight chuckle, allowing Kíli to lead him away. Kíli released his hand, and regretted it as soon as he noticed the hint of disappointment cross Bilbo’s features. But his mind was still reeling with Bilbo’s talk of fate, and of the Elvish word which was far too fitting for his own fate, and he didn’t want to further muddle his brain with thoughts of how perfect the hobbit’s skin felt beneath his fingers, or the way his pulse had sped up slightly at the contact.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry tonight's update is so short. I promise my next update will be much longer!

The cave was small, carrying and amplifying each tiny noise, so the sound of the dwarves combined breathing and snoring made it sound as if there were thousands of them. Bofur had graciously volunteered to take first watch, although Kíli suspected it was because the other dwarf was still hyper alert from the day’s events.

Kili had been on edge since the incident with the stone giants. He hadn’t left his brother’s side, too terrified that they were not yet out of danger and that he could still lose Fíli at any moment. The older dwarf tried to reassure him, to tell him that death had not yet claimed him, and that he was far from meeting his doom, but Kíli was not convinced. 

By the time sleep finally claimed him, he was plagued with familiar dreams, dreams of a door, of the clash of blades, of a battle that took his brother from him. As soon as he felt a blade pierce his own stomach, Kíli snapped awake, breathing hard.

He heard an echoing noise that could have been coming from anywhere in the cave, but he knew instinctively it was near the mouth of the cave. Sitting up slightly, he blinked a few times until he could make out two figures standing close together. Bofur’s oddly-shaped hat was easy to make out, but it was Bilbo who Kíli recognized first. 

Kíli felt his heart stop.

He didn’t need to be able to make out their echoed whispers to understand what was going on—Bilbo was leaving them. The camaraderie that they’d formed, all the times they’d risked their lives for each other…it all meant nothing to him. Fighting the urge to stand up and protest, to beg Bilbo to stay, Kíli laid back down and rolled to face his brother, focusing on the scratches on his brow, the mud caked in his beard, anything to distract him from the fact that Bilbo was leaving.

“It’s better this way.” Kíli murmured to himself, barely louder than a breath. But still, something made him turn over and slowly rise to his feet. He saw Bilbo turn, and their eyes met for the briefest of seconds. He felt his heartbeat increase, and he could have sworn Bilbo faltered, almost took a step towards him. But he hardly had time to draw a breath before the floor beneath them opened up and swallowed them whole.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter kind of...ran away from me.   
> But the good news is that I've got two more chapters planned and then the epilogue! I'll publish them as I have them ready.  
> Thank you for all of the kind words you've left in my ask box and as reviews!

As they were being ushered away by the goblins, all Kíli could think of was Bilbo. There were several dwarves and goblins between them, and every time he tried to look back, his captor violently forced him to face forward. Finally, he managed to glance backwards for a few seconds, and those were the only seconds he needed. Bilbo caught his glance and shot him an almost apologetic look before ducking down and disappearing from sight all together. 

Kíli shouted as his captor roughly shoved him back in line, partially out of protest but mostly from despair. Because once again, Bilbo Baggins had abandoned them. Or rather, the hobbit had finally managed to properly abandon them. 

“Some fate this is.” Kíli muttered. “Death at the hand of goblins while the damned burglar leaves us to rot.”

“I think you would not be so angry were it not for how close you two have grown in the past few days.” Fíli remarked, fighting his captor so he could walk closer to Kíli.

“I am unfamiliar with this closeness you speak of.” Kíli retorted.

“I saw, you know. That night in Rivendell? Your bedrolls were next to each other. That’s the first time you’ve trusted anyone other than myself and our uncle enough to sleep beside them… Could it be you’ve developed feelings for our dear burglar?”

Kíli had to force himself not to stop dead in his tracks at that. “No, of course not.” He finally answered. “Besides, even if I had, it would do no good for any of us. We’re to perish at the hand of these disgusting creatures while he…escapes. Returns to his home in the Shire and banishes all thoughts of us from his mind.”

Fíli was silent for a moment as they were manhandled across an unstable bridge, and both brothers prayed the shaky thing could hold the combined weight of the goblins as well as their company. Once he made sure no one else was listening, he leaned closer to the younger dwarf.

“If Baggins truly is your soul mate…Would you not then rather half of your soul escape this fate? Is it not better that he be spared this?” 

Kíli could only nod in response, throat seizing up and heart clenching as tears threatened to escape the corners of his eyes. He rapidly blinked, chasing them away before turning to look at his brother. “I know we most likely won’t survive the night, not against this many foes. I am grateful you are by my side, but I still… I wish I’d gotten the chance to tell him. Or to at least say how grateful I was for the time we had together as companions. Back in Rivendell, I told him that you and I knew this journey would be our last… I should have told him then. Why didn’t I say anything?”

Fíli’s answer was swallowed in the cacophony that greeted them as they entered the court of the Goblin King. But as they were pushed closer together, the older dwarf placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, grounding him. 

Kíli grit his teeth and faced the Goblin King, comforted only by the knowledge that no matter what would befall them, he would not be alone.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter wasn't supposed to exist. But here it is! So in addition to this one, you guys have two more and then the epilogue!

“Where’s Bilbo? Where’s our hobbit?” Gandalf asked. When no one answered, he repeated angrily “Where is our hobbit?”  
Despite knowing that Bilbo had abandoned them, Kíli couldn’t fight the instinctual search he immediately did of their surroundings, a small part of him hoping that Bilbo had returned at some point during their escape. His hopes were dashed, however, as soon as Thorin began ranting about the hobbit.  
“…he is long gone.” Thorin finished, looking more annoyed by the fact that Gandalf had even bothered to ask about the hobbit rather than the fact of the hobbit’s actual absence.

Kíli and Fíli exchanged a glance, but neither spoke up. Kíli tried to tell himself that it was for the best, that Bilbo would be better off far away from their company. But his mind swam with the thought that fate had given him a second chance; they hadn’t died at the hands of the goblins, meaning Kíli had a chance to tell Bilbo the truth, to say what he hadn’t been able to that night in Rivendell. 

“No.” A voice broke through his train of thought, and he could have cried of happiness at the sound. For there was Bilbo Baggins, stepping out from behind a tree. “He isn’t.”

Kíli glanced up and met Bilbo’s gaze, the hobbit giving him a slight smile while a large grin covered his own face. Even his brother was grinning, and finally Kíli managed to speak.

“Bilbo,” his voice was shaky, and he was almost breathless with relief as he took a step forward. “We’d given you up.”

“How on earth did you get past the goblins?” Fíli added.

Bilbo’s face fell at that as he laughed nervously, fiddling with his pockets.

“Well, what does it matter? He’s back!” Gandalf spoke up, but Thorin refused to accept that as an answer.

“It matters. I want to know… Why did you come back?”

Kíli returned his attention to the hobbit, curious about the answer as well. Bilbo glanced over at Kíli for a moment, holding his gaze evenly before giving Thorin an exasperated look. 

“I know you doubt me, I know you always have. And you’re right, I often think of Bag End.” He shrugged unapologetically. “I miss my books. And my armchair, and my garden. See that’s where I belong; that’s home. And that’s why I came back, ‘cause…” Kíli didn’t miss Bilbo’s quick glance his way before continuing.

“…you don’t have one, a home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back if I can.” 

There was a moment of silence, a moment in which every dwarf’s gaze was cast towards the ground, thinking of home, and what it meant for many of them. Kíli and Fíli had never seen the halls of Erebor, so for them, home simply meant each other. Except now, when Kíli thought of home, he thought of Bilbo. Of sitting by the fire and singing, sharing mead while they exchanged stories of their youth. He thought of the hobbit’s smile, of his laugh, of the way his hair never seemed to fall the same way twice, and that…that was home to him. 

He shifted his attention from the ground to look at Bilbo, catching the hobbit looking at him with an expression of…it wasn’t quite pity, it was something else. Something that reminded Kíli of his own feelings of affection. The dwarf opened his mouth to say something, taking a step forward, but the moment was broken as soon as they heard the howls of the Wargs.

“Out of the frying pan and into the fire indeed.” Kíli muttered at his uncle’s statement, chasing the others through the forest while keeping as close to Bilbo as he could.


	10. Chapter 10

Finally, finally, darkness fell over the land. They had long since made their way down the rock, all somewhat worse for wear after the battle with the orcs and wargs, and had managed to assemble a fire, around which they were all gathered.

 

“I’ll go get some more fire wood. Be back in a bit.” Kíli volunteered, rising to his feet.

 

“I’ll, um. I’ll go with you!” Bilbo stood from his seat next to Gandalf and hurried after him.

 

“Why? Afraid I’ll get up to no good?” Kíli teased, slinging an amiable arm around Bilbo’s shoulders.

 

“No, I know you’ll get up to no good. I just want to be sure it doesn’t have catastrophic results.” Bilbo retorted, face strict for a brief moment before bursting into a grin.

 

“Well, at least this way I can make sure you don’t wander off again.” Kíli found himself saying and immediately cursed his loose tongue.

 

Bilbo tensed at the statement and the pair stopped, Kíli removing his arm from the hobbit.

 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

 

“No…you’re right. I was leaving you. All of you. Even when the goblins had you…I was going to leave. I’m not proud of that, and I’m sorely glad that Gol—that events happened that led me back to you all. I know now that…my place is here. By your side—I mean, with all of you. We’re a company, after all. Got to stick together.” The hobbit was fidgeting with his pocket again and Kíli’s hand moved to grip his wrist, stilling his movement.

 

“Well I am very glad you came back. I never said… Well. I wanted to say thank you. Even when you were leaving, I was still incredibly happy I got to have the time with you that I did. You’ve changed my life, Mister Boggins.” He grinned playfully, squeezing Bilbo’s wrist.

 

“You never told me about my door either.” Bilbo glanced up, eyes searching Kíli’s face as he spoke.

 

“What about your door?” Kíli tried not to panic. He hadn’t meant to tell Bilbo about the door that day in Rivendell, and yet his tongue was soon proving to be unreliable when it came to the task of keeping things a secret.

 

“Back in Rivendell, you told me that as soon as you saw my door, you knew you were in for the time of your life.”

 

“Ah, yes that. Well, see, Gandalf marked the—”

 

“But it wasn’t just the mark on the door, was it? You’re hiding something, you have been all along… Haven’t you? You said you knew this journey would be your last, and you always—” Bilbo cut himself off, taking a deep breath before shifting his wrist in Kíli’s grip so he could grasp the dwarf’s wrist, a sort of awkward clasp. “You always fought for me, even though I’d given you no reason to.”

 

“You were a part of our company, of course I was going to fight for you!”

 

Bilbo sighed and released Kíli’s arm, taking a step back. “Of course. Right. Should we ahm. Get back to the hunt for firewood then?” the hobbit turned away and began walking further into the forest and Kíli immediately followed him.

 

“Wait!” He called. Bilbo stopped in his tracks, but remained facing the other way. Kíli closed his eyes and breathed for a moment, collecting his thoughts as much as he could before speaking. “Do you remember what you said that night? About fate and doom and all of that? I…I know exactly what he was talking about. From the time I was small, I would dream of that little green door, and of the land that surrounded it, even though I’d never even seen the Shire until this past month. Whenever I’d dream of the door, I’d see…horrible things. But when I saw the door, I’d get this feeling in my stomach like…well, like home. And I never understood it until I met you. I’m a firm believer in fate, Mr. Baggins, and I know that fate is what led me to you.”

 

“I mean, that is… you’ve been a great companion, and I can think of no one else I’d rather go on such an adventure with.” Kíli added light-heartedly after realizing how heavy his words must have seemed.

 

When Bilbo finally turned to face him, the look on his face was unreadable, even as he moved closer. The hobbit reached up to place a hand on Kíli’s cheek, eyes searching the dwarf’s face for a moment before tugging him down and pressing their lips together.

 

Kíli’s eyes went wide, and it took him a moment to register what was going on. He barely had time to respond before Bilbo was pulling back, letting his hands fall back to their earlier position of fiddling with his pockets.

 

“Sorry, but that companion spiel was rubbish and you know it.” Bilbo shot him a grin.

 

“Absolute rubbish, couldn’t agree more, now care to try that again?”

 

Bilbo laughed as Kíli grasped his wrists and brought them to wrap around his neck. The dwarf leaned down, playfully nudging Bilbo’s nose with his own before kissing him, properly this time, not just a quick press of lips, but a deep kiss that spoke of ages of longing, that felt right in ways Kíli had no way of explaining or understanding. Kíli ran his hands down Bilbo’s arms, his back, finally coming to rest on his hips and pulling him closer.

 

They had to eventually break for air, but they kept their faces close, resting their foreheads against each other’s and each laughing quietly.

 

As Kíli gazed into Bilbo’s eyes, he thought of their journey, from the first night in Bag End all the way through their most recent battle with the band of orcs. He thought of all the times they’d lost each other, of the times he was certain he’d never see the hobbit again. He banished all thoughts of the future from his mind, refusing to think of the fate that certainly awaited him, allowing the echoes of Bilbo’s words from earlier to chase such dark thoughts away.

 

_“I do believe the worst is behind us.”_


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, guys, this is it! The final chapter. I know it's insanely short, but the epilogue is much longer, and I promise it'll make up for it!  
> Thank you all for your constant support.  
> And to those of you who stuck with it from the beginning, I love you guys from the bottom of my heart. You're fantastic, your words have given me inspiration and motivation when I felt like I'd never be able to write again. So thank you so much, and I look forward to writing for you again in the very near future.

But unfortunately, Bilbo could not have been more wrong. For all their talk of 'manadh', of this fate that could be so kind as to bring them together, there was nothing they could do to prevent the outcome of their journey.

Because for as much as 'manadh' means destiny, it also means doom.

There was nothing to be done, no way to save them from this cruel fate that had become theirs.

But as Kíli lay dying on the battlefield, surrounded by the harsh sound of steel hitting steel and plunging into flesh and mere inches away from his dying brother, he uttered a silent prayer of thanks that he'd been given as much time as he had with Bilbo Baggins.

Because for as much as 'manadh' means doom, it also means destiny.

And destiny is what brought them together, and he knew that destiny would bring them together again.


	12. Epilogue

As Bilbo's weathered old hand clutched the quill, shakily transcribing the final words of his quest, Elrond moved to join him, knowing how the hobbit preferred space when he was working.

"You've left a great deal out of your adventures." the elf remarked, taking the book from Bilbo's hands. "I know it still pains you to think of him, but would you not share that part of your life with your nephew?"

"I...I couldn't even bear to write his name, most of the time." he admitted quietly. "It's been...years since that journey. And I still can't think of him--of them," he amended. "without tearing up a bit. I was a fool for thinking fate could be kind, for thinking I could go on that journey and not be changed completely."

Elrond's expression was soft as he rose to his feet and extended a hand to the hobbit. "There is no shame in mourning the loss of half of your soul, no matter how long it has been."

Bilbo smiled a bit at that, accepting the elf's offer to help him up. "Half of my soul, hm? I thought you would be more sensible than to believe things like that."

"I am sensible, which means I believe in that which I can see clearly with my own eyes." Elrond responded after a moment, his voice still quiet. "Are you ready?"

"Yes... yes, I believe I am." Bilbo smiled, accepting Elrond's help as they made their way to where the others were waiting to start their journey to Aman.

 

******

 

Bilbo knew that he wouldn't have long in the Undying Lands, so when the time came, he clutched Frodo's hand in his.

He wasn't afraid of death; he welcomed it. Bilbo Baggins had led a long life, and his journey was finally, finally coming to an end. In just a matter of moments, he could no longer feel his nephew's hand in his, and a warm light surrounded him.

It was strange, like walking into sunlight after being in a cave for years. He heard laughter, and could feel something in his chest at a familiar sound.

"Mister Baggins! I was beginning to think you'd never join us." he felt a hand clasp his shoulder, and it didn't hurt as it used to. His bones no longer ached with old age, and he hesitantly brought a hand up to his face. Gone were the wrinkles, the weathered skin. He was... young again.

"It's not nice for you to keep us waiting, Mister Baggins." another voice scolded. "Especially when you're responsible for hosting the gatherings!" A soft grin came into view, accompanied by a goofy hat, and Bilbo's grin broadened as the rest of the company--his company! came into view.

Oin, Ori, Nori, Dori, and Balin were all gathered around a large table, each clasping a tankard of some kind of ale in hand. The last time they'd all been assembled like this, they had been covered in grime and wounds from their adventure, but gone were all blemishes, and they all seemed to glow. Thorin was there, too, standing next to Balin and smiling softer than Bilbo had ever seen in life.

But what caused the warmth in his chest to spread was the sight of Kíli, standing next to his brother and grinning that all-too-familiar grin. It spoke of mischief, and yet also of a fondness and a love that ran more deep than the mines of Moria.

Fíli gave the younger dwarf a gentle push, and he took a step forward, then another, until finally, finally, Bilbo could embrace him.

"Welcome home." he whispered brokenly, and Bilbo could only nod in response, feeling tears threatening to escape.

"Perhaps fate wasn't so cruel after all."


End file.
